waking up to reruns..

it's probably my fault..

i mean groundhog's day is like one of my all time joints... "am i right or am i right?" "right?" "right?"

that dude is stoopid...

i barely feel shit..

for good reason though...

i mean... with reason..

walking through life like a tunnel..

sometimes it feels just like a tunnel...

but the walls change...

sometimes they're cement...

sometimes they're people...

walking through...

so that's it!! it all looks the same, cause i'm not really looking...

guess that explains the lack of feeling...

but i know it, so that doesn't spell out a lack of dealing...

just holding my cards a little tighter...

be nice if I could start getting up a little earlier, and my eyes could stay a little whiter...

so that's why every channel looks the same...

i'm like, "i've seen this episode", and we're watching the game...

all of a sudden, attention is expensive...

and i'm an absent minded dead beat..

it would behoove me to start saving up...

cause the sun's shine ain't gonna wait, for me to start waking up...

my pledge guys..

tomorrow, when I open my eyes, I'll open them wide open...

instead of yesterday's and today's, eyes wide shut....

not gonna lie, i'm nervous...

but excited...

first day of school, kinda groove...

i'm on it...

No more reruns...

KACM... only original programming...

Finally.. (I love you cookie and bobby)

9.21.2008 sometime in the a.m...

He couldn't hide it, he was excited..

But, he still felt bad for the puppies..

"They know.." He thought.. "We taught them right, they know.."

He didn't worry.. He just held a heavy heart..

Yes.. They would be alright, that much was made sure of everyday, everybody was together..

None the less, the Maynard crest was split into pieces, and for that he still hung his head..

But, over the last 15 long years...

No day was like today..

His girl was coming home..

And for that, he couldn't wipe that grin off his face...

I don't blame either of you crazy kids..

What soul doesn't wait in patient agony for their mate?

In the name of true love,  you have my blessing to please, rest in peace..

Love, ACM

Got it good my ass! #23!

Times is getting hard, like we should be in black and white...

Old school hard..

The desperation and the dare, in crime now, reminds me of the old west...

Kids can't afford to pay attention...

Squishing schools together, cause they can't teach on their own...

Who got it good?

True, but he would have it good regardless..

Plenty of my friends, miserable in dead-end gigs..

Can't pursue their passion, cause dreams cost money before they make money...

Right now, even the dreamers of America are playing it close to the bone...

What if Paul Revere didn't have enough gas in his horse to make it all the way to Lexington? 

I mean, everyone has to look out for Uno Nuno right now..

More than ever before...

Is anyone else feeling divided? 

Or Conquered? 

I'll tell you who feels united and victorious...

Him..

Cause he eternally got it good..

And he's not the sensitive type, so don't try to make him feel guilty about it..

Locate your joy, and don't ever show it to him..

Really considering a relocation that would involve learning a new language..

Straight faces, had a dream I was on Wall St robbing suits for stocks...

I'd sell em in-weight to Martha, and she would push it back to them cut like 4 times..

The Muppets were the Stock Task Force..

In Tommy Lee Jones voice, Kermit was chasing me all over the world, calling me Dr Kimbel.. 

I wake up, and I'm half wondering why I'm not robbing rich people..

So, I know I ain't got it good.. 

Ain't nobody waking up in the morning sad their dream is over where they robbed me..

That ain't just my crafty lil mind..

N*88as is broke these days...

Yeah, always got it better than somebody..

But, cuzn says, "just cause you put syrup on shit don't make it pancakes."

And hell no, the furry  Sam Gerard didn't catch me..

In my dreams I'm hella stealth...

and I got it good..

My Mind...that tricky lil phucker..

"You ain't shit, motherfucker. What the fuck makes you so special? You're not funny. They are laughing AT you. Starving artist my dick, you're a broke, old ass fuck up. You're not gonna make it...NO! You ain't gonna make it.. For shame, how you have disgraced the name.. Tsk,tsk.. Shoulda done the fucking homework, like Nancy told you to.. But, no.. So, look at you--check to check, night to night, hand to mouth.. And you think all that "hard work" is gonna pay off, don't you? It can only get so bad, gotta struggle to get to the good thing, blah,blah,blah--you're a corny slob. It could've been different, but you suck, so it only gets worse from here. Enjoy these days of being a scrub... You're soon to graduate to full fledged bum.."

I wish my mind would talk shit to me like that..

I'd just scream, "SHUUUT THE FUCK  UUUUUPPPPP!!!!!!!"

Silence.....

Naw, my mind is a way crafty lil fucker.

He just hints to those hurtful things about myself typed above..

And then, he'll play good cop/bad cop..

"No, that's not true."/"Well, if the shoe fuckin fits."

And I'm swaying like the wind..

Fucking with myself..

Not just when I'm bored. Not just if I'm sad. 

You know when he really wants to stick it to me?

When I'm happy...

When I, even for a moment, don't have a care in the world..

"You know this is temporary right? As soon as you walk out of this club, you better put your shit helmet back on."

You buzz killing fuck..

Um.. yeah, the problem is he's right, I'm not rich..

If I was, at least i could threaten to get a lombodomy and shut that fool up for a sec..

So I decided i was gonna "Craig" "D-BO"..

I'm staring in the mirror, all fierce faced...

My mind's like," what you gonna do with that? besides make me mad.."

And I decided, "fuck it," I'm a part-time hippy...

Fuck money! 

Yes, I overstand that in this land...

I NEED money..

But, I truly believe THEM, when they say, that if money is your only worry..... your STR8..

I wish money was my only worry..

All my other worries are actually the reason, or part of the reason I covet money...

FUCK MONEY!!!

What about him?

NO matter where i go..

what i'm doing...

successful, or pitiful..

dude is riding with me...

Lately, we've been on a new groove though...

Respecting each other's boundaries, and all that good conflict relief bullsheet..

He's still gonna be him, and I can't be nobody, but Alecks..

Yeah, he's gonna wanna spark some shit...

Guess what?

I'm a mushroom cloud laying mutherfucker too, mutherfucker..

He told me when I read him the rough draft of this, that ya'll would want to commit me, immediately..

I told him that everybody got their own shit, and that he's not that special, for the general pop to perceive him as a threat..

That's all..

Every once in a while, it's nice to dine at a turned table..

M.agic O.r M.ortality?

Fire and ashes...

Look at those flames, live with pride...

Sad embers flitter away with shame...dead and gray...

The moment where they are informed they are not fit for survival..

Lifestyles.. Life Choices..

Fate.. Circumstance..

Wonder if they knew on the wake up that today, they would use their last stack of magic?

The wisest have looked over the ledge, stared at the ground, and kept their balance...

Hard Times.. Wrinkled face,hard lines..

Frowning at the agony on my face,then smiling through the pain...

Fuck life's stylist, cause i don't like the way things done changed..

trauma couture better be a quick fad, cause it's too expensive for me to keep up with the J. Dough's..

I prefer to rock life gear when it comes to mortal clothes...

i look around the town, where did all the mortals go?

The good ones having to die would explain all these guys...

And even a lady who survived cancer...

sipped her wine right in front of me, but couldn't give me an answer...

I've seen it, and I can't tell you...

I know people who have been at the hand of it, and don't know where they sent em...

A scientist could show you charts and graphs, but so what?

A religious mind could breakdown their version to you, but with all due respect, so what?

Doesn't that kinda even everybody out?

No one you know can tell you what it's like on the other side...

Sure, people go on daytime airwaves and claim to have seen the light...

I'm not saying they haven't, but that doesn't help me understand what it means to die...

I'm gonna see light?

Ok.. I'll try to go with a pair of shades on, thanks...

Do you see yourself laying there?

Are you instantly carted off to paradise or parish?

Is there are dress code for heaven and or hell?

Is there like an AfterLife Facebook or Myspace so I can find all the homies I've been pouring some out for?

They owe me hella shots!

Is Hell like Death Prison?(just asking, none of us are fully sure of the criteria, and I know I'm boderline regardo)

Do all the angel homies come and visit and give you hot potato window bump?

I'm fucking around, but only because this shit is so crucial, I'm squirming in my seat...

Regardless of where we go, fact is, there's a circle of people, huddled together in loss when we do...

trying to understand what everyday after today means...

but what I'm trying to understand is...

what are we doing while they're trying to figure all that out?

When a flame becomes an ash..

Magic?

Or just plain old science?

Victim for breakfast...

a new neighbor moved in four doors down over the weekend...

just two guys moving in, that's all i saw...

but this morning.. one of the dudes walks in the store, as i'm at the counter paying...

i take a quick look to see, this dude got knocked the fuck out!

face all split open...

says he took the other dude i had seen him with off the street...

gave him a room in the crib, and woke up this morning to dude whaling on him..

and then stealing his bike....

this guy has just sent the entire neighborhood a really bad message...

i'd be surprised if he's still here in two weeks...

cops were in front of his house like all day...

my friends with the curbside service on the other corner surely didn't appreciate it...

these are the people in my neighborhood..

natural tone..(that Hallmark flavor)

   You were born on a clear night, right outside the capital of less is more..

Dawn captures you how i picture you..

natural...

the way mom likes to see you when you visit...

natural..

like the first time she cradled your tiny frame..

see..i like you all dolled up in make up..

but compared to just you, it ain't the same..

i don't find our kisses plain..

without lipstick, our lips will still stick..

please no bells or whistles..

just you, lady natural..

skin as smooth as a dream when you fall down..

baby, you don't need that rouge right now..

this isn't my master plot to get you naked..

well,not completely..

just a little spring cleaning, eliminating the unnecessary..

me the nocturnalist, started to go to bed early..

just to catch your morning face..morning's grace...

i've gone to sleep for the night, i can't wait..

it's the natural slumber, the natural dreams, the natural tone...

of our close bodies, and our wandering souls...

sunrise brings those journeys to a close...

sweatbeads on your forehead looks like dew on a rose..

so i lean in, and smell your cheek..

mother earth's new scent..

in stores now..

and she's calling it you..